Tales from Suburban Bohemia: SMS Horoscopes
This post originally appeared on Stumpy Moose on 4 August, 2001, and was migrated to PraguePig.com on 25 November, 2018.
Maybe I have too much time on my hands.
For some reason I signed up with Yahoo! to have SMS horoscopes delivered to my mobile phone every day.
It’s a free service so I shouldn’t complain, but the messages have become increasingly bizarre — sinister even.
Most of the time they just seem to be three randomly selected sentences that bear little relationship to each other. At other times they seem to hint at some deeper, darker truth.
Sometimes it all gets a bit close for comfort:
- You’re attracted to the rude and the inappropriate. Stop it before you go too far.
(August 29th)
Occasionally, there are distinct fascist undertones:
- Doubts are a joke. Your strength drowns out all weakness. Popularity fills the gap.
(August 23rd)
Or:
- Instinct gets louder. Associates bow to your power. You roar back with a vengeance.
(August 12th)
Sometimes there’s a sinister psychedelic feel:
- You like it bright and loud. Events happen around you. Play before deciding.
(August 18th)
Or:
- The system can serve you. Choose fame over infamy. Possess without sacrificing.
(August 16th)
Who’s writing this stuff? Friedrich Nietzsche?
I’m going to find out.
